The Trust Factor

I am a planner. And not only that, if I don’t feel as if things are moving in forward motion, I tend to get nervous. 

Each year, we host the He Loves Me Conference at First Baptist Church of Glenarden, and this year, our planning took an unexpected turn. While COVID statistics were going in the right direction for my home state of Maryland, my county’s numbers were not. So a few weeks before the conference, we decided to go virtual.

To be honest, this decision caused me to be in my feelings. You know, the kind of feelings that allow disappointment to take up space. I remember as I was lying in bed, wide awake, I began to pray, “Lord, how is this conference going to come together?” And then, almost instantly, it dawned on me.

If God is up, why am I up?

I realized that when things don’t come together as I think they should, and when my fingers are not on the pulse of what I am planning, I get anxious.

Making the pivot from in-person to virtual was crazy and so different. Yet, with everything going in all directions and not being able to keep the planning organized, God still showed up and encouraged me through others.

Right before the conference, amidst our change of plans, a woman said to me, “The conference had some unconventional planning, but it has been amazing to see how it is coming together!”

It was at this moment that I began to ponder the trust I have with God and with others.

The Trust Factor With God in Our Circumstances

Learning to trust God is an intentional and gradual process, and I am so thankful that His mercies are new every morning. 

Remembering how God has moved in my life has helped me walk through quite a few uncomfortable circumstances. As I think about the stepping stones of His goodness within these areas, I am also strengthening my trust in Him.

So how can we be intentional about strengthening our trust in God?

First, we pay attention to God in the ordinary. Where has He shown up in your life today? Start small and simple and build your trust foundation from there.

Secondly, as we consider His goodness in the little things, we take note of how He has and is continuing to work things out on our behalf. When we evaluate what He has done in the past, we are learning to trust Him.

The Trust Factor With God in Our Relationships

You may have heard the saying, “It can take a lifetime to build trust and only a second to lose it.”

A violation of trust is complicated. It is encompassed by unmet intentions, unspoken expectations, and human error. It can feel lonely, unsafe, and isolating. 

However real the violation of trust may feel, we can find comfort in knowing that we are safe with Jesus. 

Psalms 62:1-2, TPT says:

“I stand silently to listen for the one I love, 

waiting as long as it takes for the Lord to rescue me.

For God alone has become my Savior.

He alone is my safe place;

his wraparound presence always protects me.

For he is my champion defender; 

there’s no risk of failure with God.

So why would I let worry paralyze me, 

even when troubles multiply around me?”

As we wait on God, we learn to watch how He will figure it out.

As we wait on God, we see what He will do.

And as we wait on God, we can be assured that He is always with us.

How Do We Extend Trust?

One thing I am learning about building trust is that it isn’t as difficult as I thought it was.

It is as simple as deciding for yourself that you will forgive the person who hurt you.

However, this does not mean that the pain you are experiencing is not real. It also does not excuse their behavior for how they hurt you. And it most certainly does not permit them to continue to hurt you.

Like anything else, extending forgiveness and trust is a habit and daily choice we must practice for ourselves.

So how do we extend trust?

We simply say, “You hurt me, and I forgive you. From this point on, I will extend trust to this line.” This is where trust boundaries come into play. By placing limits on the trust you have for someone who hurt you, you are not secluding them, but you are allowing a space where you both can be intentional about trust in your relationship.

Just as the Lord entrusts to everyone according to their ability, we also can learn to do the same with others in our lives according to their ability.

We are all imperfect humans in need of grace and mercy, not only from our Father but with each other. And as we extend trust, we are also extending the grace and mercy that God has lavished upon us through His son, Jesus Christ.

Sisters, let us move forward as being known for our grace and mercy through forgiveness and extending trust.